We all know that in our lives, our environment does not always support and encourage us, and we often hear different voices criticizing and criticizing our choices. The best you can do in such cases is to get away from opponents and critics, but if you could stay away from negative voices? And if the negative voice that weighs on us comes from within?
Self-criticism is kind of a good thing, because it’s kind of a test that helps us to be better people. There is, however, a significant difference between a sentence such as “I have to work harder on this task”, which can be motivating, and a phrase like “I will never succeed”, which can give us up. Excessive self-criticism acts as a boomerang for us to focus on our failures rather than the opportunities we can improve that can cause stress, anxiety and even depression. The important tips in the next article will help you to silence the negative and critical voice in your head, which often prevents you from succeeding.
1. Recognize your negative thoughts.
If you receive an e-mail from the manager saying “I have to meet you as soon as possible”, do you think that you will be fired or do you think you need a salary increase?
Many of your thoughts are automatic. They jump into your head without conscious effort.
Therefore, it is important to take a moment to evaluate your thoughts in order to recognize unrealistic, unproductive or irrational thoughts.
2. Examine the evidence.
Your thoughts are not always true. In fact, they are often too negative. It is important to review the evidence before you believe your thoughts.
If you think “I’m going to embarrass myself if I give this presentation,” take a moment to take a break. Take out a piece of paper and write down all the evidence that indicates a failure. Then list all the evidence that you will not fail. If you examine the evidence from both sides, you can look at the situation in a more rational and less emotional way. If you remember that your thoughts are not 100% true, you can increase your self-confidence.
3. Practice Affirmations
“If you find yourself engaging in negative self talk sometimes it’s easier to change that thought than to stop thinking it,” says Gruver. “Using affirmations is a fabulous way to do that. The key to affirmations is to keep them short, in the present, and positive. Saying something like ‘I am healthy and well’ or ‘I am beautiful and loved’ or ‘I’m surrounded by loving and supportive friends.’”
4. Tell your best friend how to solve the problem
Do not be afraid to turn to a friend or someone you trust when you have a moment of weakness. “When we share our feelings of embarrassment, disappointment or frustration, we can see if the things we say to ourselves are useful or useless – especially when it comes to feeling better,” Dattilo said. “Sometimes, when we say things out loud instead of keeping them locked, we can see how unfair and unnecessary our comments are.”
5. Imagine the worst
Sometimes the best way to deal with negative inner speech is to confront it head-on. Ask yourself, “How would it be if I got fired?” Next, think about your reaction for a few minutes.
Whether you are applying for another job or creating your own business, the choice is yours. It would not be the end of the world. If you remember that you are finally fine, you can dispel panic, anxiety and worry.
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