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“You are going to meet that person who is going to love you the way that you deserve to be loved; the way that you have always wanted to be loved.”
“Maybe our mistakes are what make our fate.” ~ Carrie Bradshaw
Maybe it’s true that we need to first become broken before we can finally become whole.
A love that is painful is the worst kind of heartbreak. You know the one… you had such high hopes, it was the one you risked everything for—only to find it was a bet that you could never win.
We then break into a billion tiny pieces of ourselves and think about how we could have gotten it so wrong.
We all make mistakes when it comes to love.
We choose our partners based on the lessons that our souls must learn. And we do this without realizing that it’s usually those painful lessons we have to go through the most.
We can not transform ourselves through an easy life and we can’t have our minds expanded by the mundane. This only happens when we are left with only ourselves and our regrets.
Maybe there is no mistake if it’s what we needed to learn more about our true selves and how we love. Of course, there will always be those loves we wish we could go back in time for, and just fix. Those ones with endings that were too painful for us to want to permanently write down as part of our past.
No matter how badly we wanted this love to be something other than what it was, it won’t change the harsh reality: we needed this love in our lives to break our hearts.
The absolute truth is that we need a big mistake to propel us towards the love of our life.
We have to fall apart in order to find out how we want to put ourselves back together.
This pain and suffering are what carves our way through to the love of our life that we find later.
One of the biggest mistakes we make in love is to persist in a relationship that we should have walked out of the moment we got into it. If not that, we must have gotten out of it long before we did and definitely not let it go all the way till it all went downhill.
However, this does not indicate that this love was meant to be forever – it was a time that made you realize what love really is.
We have all been in such relationships and we have all tried to heal the wounds and ensure that love does not end the way it did – but you must understand, you have very little to do with it. What’s meant to be, is meant to be.
But why does this love end in a catastrophe?
It does because it wants to shake you to your core and make you realize every belief you have about love.
Post this disaster (as you call it), you are meant to question what went wrong and you really would think hard about what love really is. The healing will never take a day – it is simply a matter of accepting the truth. You have healed, the day you have accepted the truth.
The day you accept the truth, you will know that your true love waiting out there in the world.
And this time it will be different. You would be loved for who you are, you will be pushed to do what you really love to do, and then you will turn around to realize that this is what you always were looking for.
The mistakes we make today are the ones that leave us better later. Sure, it hurts right now but tomorrow you will find something better because you will then know better what you are looking for.
You only get what you are looking for when you are ready. Do not give up if you are hurt, embrace it.
The love you’d find forever will have no connection to all the old ones, it will feel different and that is exactly when you will know that you have achieved mending a broken hurt as a stronger person.
You will look within that love for the solitude and not chaos.
You will look for meaning and not what you think you want. You will have more comfort in being held, you will enjoy the conversations and you will pick being home with your beloved any day and that is the love when you will say yes.
It will make you realize how glad you are of making that mistake. You finally would know what matters to you and it will all follow like a river, calm and quiet.