A young man was visiting his brother and sister-in-law for the holidays. As he arrived at their house he found his young nephew, Timmy, helping them bake some cupcakes. After they were done, his sister-in-law allowed Timmy to put the icing on. When the boy had finished, he brought them to the table. “The cupcakes … Read more
A wolf is walking through the forest and sees a beaver. “Come here” he says. The Beaver comes over and the wolf, looking at a list in his hand, says “Ah here you are. Mr. Beaver. You’ll come to the big field tomorrow at 8am and I’ll eat you for breakfast. Any questions?” “No” says … Read more
Mr. and Mrs. Thomas were both 102 years old. They had been married for 74 years. The local television station sent a news crew out to interview them. “What we need to do,” the reporter explained, “is to interview you separately. It just seems to make for a better write-up, when we do it that … Read more
A man is sent to prison for the first time. At night, the lights in the cell block are turned off, and his cellmate goes over to the bars and yells, “Number twelve!” The whole cell block breaks out laughing. A few minutes later, somebody else in the cell block yells, “Number four!” Again, the … Read more
Little Johnny was playing in his room,… when his dad walked in and explained that he and his mom were getting a divorce. “Why Daddy?” asked a confused Little Johnny. “Well, son” he explained, “Your mother and I are no longer in love.” Now more confused, Little Johnny asked, “What does being in love mean?” … Read more
A wife comes home late one night and quietly opens the door to her bedroom. From under the blanket, she sees four legs instead of just her husband’s two. She reaches for a baseball bat and starts hitting the blanket as hard as she can. Once she’s done, she goes to the kitchen to have … Read more
Maurice is 70 years old and makes an appointment to see his doctor. His doctor asks him a few questions. “Do you have any problems urinating?” Maurice replies “No, Doctor. It’s very regular, every morning at 7 am.” “And what about your bowel movements?” Maurice replies “They’re fine also, Doctor. Every morning at 8 am.” … Read more
An elderly inventor was becoming depressed with his life: His hearing was failing, his wife was always nagging him, he hadn’t invented anything good in years, and his former good looks had been replaced by wrinkles and sagging skin. He goes to the doctor to discuss his depression. When he arrives back home he has … Read more
When he noticed a little girl nearby in a little red wagon with little ladders hung off the sides and a garden hose tightly coiled in the middle. The girl was wearing a firefighter’s helmet. The wagon was being pulled by her dog and her cat. The firefighter walked over to take a closer look. … Read more
Mr. Bear, Mr. Rabbit and the Golden Frog. Mr. Bear and Mr. Rabbit didn’t like each other very much. One day, while walking through the woods, and they came across a golden frog. They were amazed when the frog talked to them. The golden frog admitted that he didn’t often meet anyone, but, when he … Read more