A man walks into a bar with a small turtle in his hand.
The turtle has one black eye, two of its legs are twisted horrifically and its shell is duct-taped together.
The bartender, about to tie his German Shepard to the counter, asks the man,
“Is your turtle OK?”
“Better than that,” the man responds,
“This turtle is incredibly fast. In fact, go over to the other side of the bar and on the count of three calls over that dog of yours. I bet $50 that my turtle can reach that side of the bar before your dog can.”
Believing this is an easy $50, and that the man was mad, he accepts and walks to the wall of the bar opposite to where his dog, the turtle and the man were.
On the count of three, the bartender calls over his dog.
But suddenly, the man picks up his turtle and throws it across the room, barely missing the bartender and smashing into the wall.
The man walks over to the horrified bartender and gleefully says,